Bannaroo / Colleen Breen

Name’s Nancy Collins.

Small fact: only person to be conceived and birthed at Bonnaroo.

Growing up, I was an only child that lived in a Winnebago with my parents. We only camped at live music festivals. Ya know, hippie spirits are my parents.

Like most daughters, I became the opposite of my parents. Proud and comfortable introvert here, and lucky to be one. It allows me to run the only privately owned, indoor, cage-free, never-visited zoo in the world.

Let’s start the tour, online of course—I don’t leave my studio. This is my pride and joy; Bannaroo( a 30 lb orange tabby that’s overweight due to consistent feedings which is due to, well you'll see).

Now, no animal should be in a zoo, but Bannaroo was domesticated before I adopted him. Believe me, I’ve tried. I’ve released him multiple times, but he still comes back when I call his name and give him a treat. He’s also the longest relationship I’ve ever had.

Before Bannaroo, my longest relationship was one date. That’s one date too many, if you ask me. Just like Lizzo, I’m my own best friend, besides Bannaroo.

Let’s move on. This is my next precious inhabitant: This is Banaroo( The same 30 lb orange tabby).

Now, no animal should be in a zoo, but Banaroo was domesticated before I adopted him.

Speaking of Bannaroo, did you know that on my 21st Birthday my parents bought me a ticket to Bannaroo as a present where I had an accident that caused me to lose my short term memory. I was watching Puddle of Mud, and thought it was an oxymoron, so I was walking towards the stage to clarify this with the band when I was picked up to be crowd surfed. Before I knew it, I was dropped (most likely because whoever dropped me was wondering if the band’s name was a pun or just clever like all alternative bands). The last thing I remember is a man holding out his hand to help me up. I remember him last, because he was wearing a t-shirt that said “Eat a Weiner,” that had a picture of a hot dog bun, but instead of a weiner, it was, well you know what I mean.

Well, I think it was a penis. I’ve only seen three in my life and none of them seemed like it was a weiner of any sort. The first one I saw was when I accidentally walked into a man’s bathroom at a Papa John’s restaurant. To me it just looked like a sad, limp worm that washes up on a sidewalk after a long rain.

The second was when I walked behind a Papa John’s restaurant while sight-seeing in Cleveland. That just looked like a molded, congealed loaf of bread left out during a garbage strike while suffering through a summer heat wave in Cleveland.

Did you know that I live in Cleveland? Fun Fact.

Another fun fact, I only eat Papa John’s Pizza, and I was only there because I lost my phone, and believe the internet is a conspiracy.

The third time was a Papa John’s delivery driver that delivered my pizza. It looked like an inverted belly button. Turns out it was his belly button. His t-shirt was too short and his belly hung in front of where the thighs kiss together.

Now don’t get me wrong—I’m body positive, but my thighs overlay so much that by now they’re married. Don’t bother me; just one of the perks of being an introvert that never leaves home.

But best perk is that it allows me to run this 24/7 private zoo.

Now let's move on to the last of my prized inhabitants of this zoo.

This is Bannaroo( The same 30 lb orange tabby).